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hey girl i feel like that all the time and it hurts so much and i cry alot i also deal with ptsd something that will never go away and i got lamed for my rape and everything else i just never feeled love like at all i had took an hiv test and my results came back negative but it hurts that im now paranoid because so many times i ex played with my life he was rapping me and wasnt using protection and i hated myself so much alot of the time try to figure out why im here all the time that hurts feel so unwanted if any body has the answer please message me and i haven't had sex after i was tested does that mean im okay and im just always scard so hard to trust men .....
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I am so glad you found the site, you are not alone, nor are you the bad guy. Hopefully this site will give you a venue to speak openly about your issues and well as point you towards tools that will help you work towards a better place.
hugs-
CK
Sometimes I believe in as many as six impossible things before breakfast-Alice in Wonderland